A Forgiving Heart
Morning Blues Isn’t it just so hard to let go of grudges at times? Don’t we all tend to ruminate the wrongdoings against us? I realized I was guilty of this a few days ago when my daughter did not listen to me in the morning before school. She ultimately was grounded from electronics because she did not want to listen. I followed through with the grounding. However, because I was hurt and took her actions personally, I kept mentioning her mistakes and bad behavior the rest of the afternoon. After another reminder of her mistake that morning, she said to me, “Mom why are you being mean?” I didn’t say anything and realized that I was being mean to my little girl who is ultimately just a child with bad days and good days. Key notes We as adults can’t control our emotional outbursts a lot of days, and we expect our children to be perfect. The Lord gave me my children to show me the practice of patience and kindness. I didn’t realize until the next morning why my behavior occurred in the first place. I was holding a grudge because she hurt my feelings by not respecting and listening to her mom. For some reason, she woke up in the middle of the night and could not go back to sleep. That’s why she was tired and acting out. Instead of being empathetic to her exhaustion, I felt she was being disrespectful on purpose. Next time I will focus on empathy and forgiveness. The Parable of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32) is a great story about forgiveness to remind us of our responsibility to forgive the people in our lives.
Peace of Mind with Less Stuff
Have you ever felt anxious and frustrated at home more than any place else? I started feeling this anxiety when I was in my house more so, than at work or out with friends. I found myself finding excuses to leave my home for another appointment, or a shopping outing. Then I realized it was the stuff in my house causing my stress. When we have too many things to manage, life is more stressful. I started listening to the Minimal Mom podcast and I loved the way she described minimalism in such a way that was doable for my lifestyle. She made me want to clear my stuff – to clear my mind. This desire to have more and more is futile. I am now in my mid-40’s and I spent most of my 20’s and 30’s chasing goals, ambitions, and this dream of what I thought a happy life looked like to me. That perpetual rat race got me chronic stress and constant worry. The Bible states “You work and worry your way through life, and what do you have to show for it?” Ecclesiastes 2:22 This quote was said by David’s son, a King of Jerusalem, in his older age. He is reflecting on how meaningless life can be if you only seek material worldly gifts. We are in such a material world full of influencers, celebrities, and friends and family telling us we need the next big thing to feel worthy of love and happiness. I try to focus on my spiritual and moral growth as a Christian mom and wife and less on comparing myself to others. That’s the beauty of humanity. We all have our own stories to tell and we all come from different experiences and yet we all yearn for the same things – human interaction and hope. In this book of the Bible, the author realizes “it is better to have only a little, with peace of mind, than be busy all the time with both hands, trying to catch the wind.” Ecclesiastes 4:6 This view is the opposite of the “hustle culture” we are in today. So on the days I feel stressed and it seems like everything is bothering me in my house, I start with a trash bag and a sweep of my house. Living with two kids, a husband, three dogs, and multiple family friends visiting on the regular.. our house can get out of place quickly. Just doing that quick scan for trash and things we don’t need and trashing, recycling, or donating items helps so much to relax my mind and my space. When you have more time, a deep decluttering of closets and drawers trains your brain to let go of material objects. I found myself having more time for “me time” when I decluttered. The Minimal Mom, Dawn Madsen says it well in one of her episodes – maybe at this time in your life, you are only supposed to manage a small amount of items. In another season of life, it may be different. I hope you take the advice of the book of Ecclesiastes and slow down and enjoy life with the ones you love because that is what life is truly about -God and love.